Carrying the worries of tomorrow can steal the joy for today. As a family caregiver, my days were filled with meeting someone else’s needs, but there is a fine line between being aware of my to-do list and worrying about things over which I had little control, may never transpire, or come between me and the Lord.

I distinctly remember the terror I felt sitting in the PICU,where my daughter was recovering from a heart surgery, and being told  that our insurance had dropped us. My mind started calculating all of the things we would have to give up in order to cover the medical bill out of pocket. I heard somewhere that a single day in the ICU is about $10,000. The mental math I was doing nearly put me into a panic attack. In those moments, my mind did not turn to God for comfort, peace, or provision.

The lesson that took me a while to understand is that while I felt as though my entire foundation was being shaken in that moment, it was really just a wave of a storm that crashed against me while I stood on the Rock of Ages. The hospital wasn’t going to withdraw my daughter’s care. Our team helped sort our the problems with insurance and made sure we were covered again. And even if we had seen those bills, we had a support system that would have made sure we didn’t lose our home or go hungry. All my worry was for naught. It kept me from experiencing the peace of God. It kept me from being more comforting for my daughter in her healing. And it kept me from showing others the hope that I had in my Savior.

Whenever I am tempted to fall into the trap of believing I have to do everything in my own power, I reflect on the next part of the scripture in Matthew. It says, “Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” Meditating on these words assures me that my father in heaven loves me, loves my husband, and loves my children–more than I do!

We all have to choose which master we are going to serve. The enemy constantly tries to reassure us that comfort in this life is what is important, but we have to remember that where our treasure is, there our heart will be also. For me, I choose the Creator of the world who knows my every need, loved me enough to send his Son as a sacrifice for my sins, and wants a relationship with me, though I fail him regularly. As they say every day on the Bible Recap–He’s where the joy is!